"there is a world of difference between being offensive and saying something that offends...the man who makes a racial slur betrays something ugly in him. The friend who says you've had too much to drink spares you something ugly in you." - John Eldredge, Beautiful Outlaw
And so I sat willingly tonight with the guy who's willing to hold up the mirror to who I am. I've created another romantic disaster, and I'm at a place where I'm so wanting to change and stop making the same mistakes. No more carnage. I'm terrified of the havoc I might wreak in Japan, surrounded by Marines and fighter pilots.
So I got this advice:
- back off-- too much enthusiasm and effort scares guys away
- don't be so harsh-- my rough, critical edge are too abrasive
- communicate-- say exactly what you want and expect
I'm only spelling this out because I want my friends to hold me to this. Please hold me to this.
2 comments:
I'd like to hold a mirror up too. I see brave, beautiful, independent, and smart. :-)
great advice. kudos to you for really listening. i need to remember this with my husband...particularly numbers 2 & 3.
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